New Owner: No Trespassing Except for Blondes

“New Owner: No Trespassing Except for Blondes” was the sign over one of my best holes on seldom-fished Secret River, and it was enough to quake my Reeboks.  There must be a way to deal with this, I thought. And there was. 


I drove
to Goodwill, and bought a blonde wig.  I used balloons for breasts, and drove back.

On the
way, one of the balloons lost air so I had uneven
breasts.  I hadn’t shaved in four days which probably didn’t help my
case.  On the second cast, I caught a beautiful hatchery buck steelhead about 16 pounds pictured above.  A few casts later, I caught his little brother.  As I was carrying them up
the trail, an old gray codger appeared on a bluff.  “Well, you ain’t the prettiest blonde I seen” he scoffed.
“But rules is rules.”

“Come
here and give Hilda a kiss,” I cackled.


“No
thanks,” he said, then walked up to his white house with
green trim, and slammed the door — hard.

 The lengths some guys will go to catch a steelhead.


With two fish in the cooler, I drove to the Oregon coast to attend the Writing Lounge at Hoffman Center in Manzanita.  Great people, and great sharing.  I was invited to offer a writing prompt next week, Jan. 13, 10:30 a.m. to 1 p.m. during their Writing Lounge. There is a $5 suggested donation which helps the Hoffman Center and their literary/art journal North Coast Squid. Maybe I’ll see you there.

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